MyNation Foundation Forum » Miscellaneous » Marital Problems


(43 posts)
  1. PADMA

    FINALLY I HAVE decided, let all come let me see what they have to say. as i am right on my part. i am ready to face them. and wish the truth wins over lie. and hope my husband realises what kind of family he has. if still things go wroung i would only tell them iam married to their son, we had misunderstandings now iam ready to correct my self in all aspects and he too may realise his mistakes like beating and not supporting. even after that his family creats mess what can i do. because i am not sure any thing may happen they are so **** people. after one years of marriage after my husband running back to his parents and family now they all keep him and come to fight on issues which is over instead of making us one and letting us to lead our life. then spoiling my husbands head against me and my family. some times people are so cruel they are so selfish i realised now. hope they dont give me a chance to make them stsnd in court. in this case i hope law would accept my problem and help me to stay with my husband . once i get a chance to stay with him i can really make him understand the truth, i trust my love he is with them so he is not allowed to talk with me he neds to do what they say.

    i would say that i need my husband back i really dont want to loose him, i want him to take me with him and look after me in life as a good husband , leaving all matters and problems in our past, if they go out of limits i only want to fight for my rieghts to get my husbnad back in my life. thats all i dont have any intention to roam to court or station or insult my husband , its in his hands to avoid me to go to such extent to get him banck in my life,. i no its all bad and hurting and this matter amy lead to more problems and careless ness in my husbands attitude, i am worried really its hurting a lot. iam a women i need a husband to lead my life respectfully i dont want to loose him. more than all. iam feeling bad that all are trying to break our relationship. as ours is a love marriage, how can i forget his love, and be alive. its hurting...

    pl advice me. at this stage what is my role. what best i need to do.

    Posted 8 years ago #
  2. ADMIN
    Key Master

    PADMA, by force no one won anything so far.
    Dowry case (498a) DVA or any other case will not solve your problem, As i seen in our 6000 Plus families only 2 or 3 back with husband. thats also not willingly.

    No man will run back to his mother, if he get enough from his wife. You have to give more love and care than his mother. its difficult to break his 25/30 years of mothers food and love,still its wife duty to perform better than that. else man always has option, Read this

    Never say he has to take care of you, you take care of him,meet his needs and he will do the same,coz yours is love marriage.

    Women always find faults in her man after marriage,carelesness and attitude, same they dont find when they are romancing(before marriage) so now you know who changed, and what made him change.

    If you think you can make them to stand in court, well then go ahead and do it, and you will know who is loser.

    Posted 8 years ago #
  3. PADMA


    At last by gods grace, Yesterday I and my parents visited my husbands place finally to discuss the matter as they wanted us to come and talk. All of his family members up to ten persons were present. But I dint care; gradually our topic came out as to what to do next. In fact his family dad and mom and uncle told that we have married after loving each other now we need to adjust and go a head in life, and care for each other and every thing was that they wanted me to change as usually and adjust with all in every matter I agreed to it. Finally my husband also was cool we spoke to each other and I promised him we shall never fight iam so happy with lots of pain and tears, i told him that I shall never hurt him again in any matter. He also told that not to discuss any matter of our personal to any one nor his or my family. His father asked him to take me on Sunday to his native and both will stay with his parents.

    I am really happy, today that I have got back my husband in my life. I have really understood all of your advices and want to begin a new life with him, THANKS A LOT.

    Posted 8 years ago #
  4. PADMA


    Posted 8 years ago #
  5. james

    Hi Padma,
    I am so happy that you got what you were looking for. See how your patients paid off?
    Trust me, he cares for you. If not, he would not have said "not to discuss any matter of our personal to any one nor his or my family" and he wants to put everything behind lead a happy life with you. But just pay little attention and handle people, situtation and relations with extra caution. I am sure, you would be happy with the results.

    Honestly speeking, I am very happy to see an update from you with positive outcome.

    I wish you good luck and 10 years or 15 years for now when you have kids around you with growing responsiblities and unconditional love towards each other, all that has happened in the past looks very small and you will be glad that you were able to put everything behind you.

    My best wishes.


    Posted 8 years ago #
  6. PADMA

    hi Mr.James,

    let me tel u some things even if ur feeling bored of my talks ... i hope ur not.

    i would say by all of your suggessions i could really understand what is life. in fact i was blind in his love i always felt he is mine so he would understand me no matter in what way i put things across to him, but now i have totally realised what to do what not. i only no keeping him happy is my only aim. i want him to realise how much i love him, how much i miss him always . sir i no that his family is always indirectly even in future will bother him in our life in our every matter. but iam prepared to be paitent i have understood that day will come wen he himself will realise what his family members are.

    sir thanks for ur kind suggessions i am really thankful to u. always shall remember ur help. and pray for u and your family.
    he calls me every day at least once, iam really happy, i could not believe he will come back u no i was so worried were he will leave me alone . tis sunday he is comming home to take me. its a new life for me. hope ur blessing are always there for me.

    as u told paitents will pay one day. he is so good i dont no why all of sudden he behaved tis way. i would say always because of his family he does so. as u no there is a saying one rotten mango will spoil the other. just think he is lotus in a dirty pond. when he came to me i new tis . now to get the lotus for me i have entered the pond but one day i will make it.

    now i no how to tackle his family so that he will never find fault in me. so much they have told against me to him one day they will feel guilty for this. i dont have any problem with his family infact iam least bothered sir, i nither want to be close to his family nor avoide them i have realise how to deal to them.

    let me tell u one incident, of that day when i went with my parents, after all talks all elders suggested us not to fight and understand, later, father inlaw called my sister inlaw who was cooking , to speak IN TIS MATTER imagine he being father, he is the elder, my husband is his son instead of he speaking he allows her to talk can u guess what kind of father in law i have. he allows not only her but all of his other family members to talk and simply watch.
    he cant take a step for his son but always allows other family members to interfere. this is what i hate in him. in every matter he dose so. later sisterinlaw came and said some thing to my mom till then i never opened my mouth ,
    but i had to speak , i came near my mom and said to keep quit and i shall talk now. all were silent. i said to my sis in law " tell me what proble u have with me"i shall slove not my parents. later her husband came in between and said its not ur problem its both of urs problem ,we are here to solve.
    i said ok let me explain i told openly that "my husband is angry because i discussed our problem to u people" both his brother and sister in law were standing opposit to me. all were watching siliently i continued to my sis in law that

    also i told her that " my husband is angry as i said him" that u suggested me to hit him back if he beats me" she started getting angry and just went inside the kitchen stating that "i dint teach u any thing". she was worried if i would tell every thing about her in front of all the people. never again she came out and spoke. sir dont u think if she had been correct she would have argued instead of running away right. see what kind of people they are.

    later all told to leave the matter. they told i should not commit any suicied in his native in future. i told" if i had to die three months are not reuired for me. iam alive to get my love back iam alive here to take my life my husband back as i love him. his is my every thing. my life. u no what was next ,,,, my husband in turn stated that i too loved u a lot thats y i married going against all this family members "pointing to allof his family . i was so happy sir my heart was so happy. i felt at least my husband made them realise that he loves me a lot. i too love him a lot.

    and i told u previously about his aunty who told that iam not a virgin and want not. the same women says to my mom " ur daughter has spoke about me in singular still i forgive her about this " she could have fought but she dint because she knows my mom would have given her properly about this matter that how could she speak about my virginity. see how people changed. sir i am right may be god has helped me for this truthfullness i feel.

    now i no how to deal with all of them. thank a lot for ur precious time.

    Posted 8 years ago #
  7. rajsum2

    Dear Padma,

    I'm happy to hear ur back with ur hubby. In the future to avoid such things happening again u may read the following advice.

    I'm married and have a kid.

    To solve your prob u must know about indian husband mentallity. We want our wives to be submissive. Not to back answer. If you talk anything about their side the blood shoots up even if it has a good reason. So the only way to resolve is be submissive but politley when you have good times together try to explain in a soft way what you want to say. Never object to anything these indian husbands say immediately or harsely.

    I'm also like your husband a bit short tempered. You must first know how short tempered people behave and why. This I'm telling you because u said u have a love marriage. All the anger the bad words the physical assault is for that moment. We really don't know why we did it and whether we did it atall. I'm justifying the action but the reasons for it. Just after the moment I love my wife more since I might have shouted at her or beat her. She is also like you always backanswering which aggravates the situation. I always after a fight go after her begging to forgive me.

    I hope you understand what i'm trying to do. You are like my wife and Your husband like me. Thats why I think you will understand. I'm also simply one of those authoritative hitempered indian husband

    Posted 8 years ago #

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